When You Think No One Notices

You matter.  A lot.  Do you know this?  It’s true!

You might think, “Who me? I’m just a … (insert profession or station in life).”

I am just a regular person. Average. Normal. Well, as much as any of us are "normal."

I worked as a secretary at a real estate office out of high school, got married in my early 20s, and spent the last twenty years as a stay-at-home and homeschooling mom. I don’t have a college degree. I didn’t have a big career or travel the world before becoming a wife and mother, and I haven’t earned a paycheck in about 17 years. I have volunteered at church since I was a teenager and I have served in the homeschool community for a dozen or more years. I am a woman who loves the Lord and loves my family. Nothing particularly noteworthy, but it is a good, satisfying life.

I am aware that I have an impact on others, but I don’t normally think about myself in that way. I do think about using my time, energy, and resources in a way that glorifies God and hopefully enriches the lives of others. My mind is on Him and on others, not on myself unless I’m thinking about ways I’ve dropped the ball, failed, or fallen short. (Why do we do that?)

And I forget. I forget that I matter. I forget that my life makes a difference. Not from a defeated, run down, "I'm not worthy" position, but rather from a place where I'm so busy living life that I don't stop to think about it.

I think most of us do this. We are so busy being moms, wives, dads, husbands, employees, business owners, friends, volunteers, church members, coaches, keepers of our homes, need meeters … the list goes on … that we don’t often stop to think about the positive ways we impact and enrich the lives of others or how truly important that really is.

A couple of things happened this past week that made me realize how much my life matters in the little universe I inhabit. Things I give little thought to … and sometimes things that I might hope that no one ever notices. They matter in ways I don’t know if I’ll ever comprehend this side of heaven.

For eight years, James and I served as the Support Group Liaisons for AFHE. One of the many fun things I got to do was to host the annual leadership conference for Arizona homeschool group leaders along with a Mid-Year Refresher for homeschool parents that takes place the night before the leadership conference.  Many of the homeschool group leaders from around the state have become dear friends as I’ve gotten to know them over the years.  I cherish these folks who volunteer their time to serve homeschooling families in their area.  I also thrive on hosting events. I truly enjoy every little detail involved in planning an event that encourages and equips others. A little over a year ago, a new board couple took over our role as Support Group Liaisons. I am truly thankful for Rich and Heather and not only their willingness to serve in this way, but to take on the role with such zeal and enthusiasm. They are doing a fantastic job and I am relieved to turn this area over to such a caring, dedicated couple.

I wasn’t able to attend this year’s Mid-Year Refresher, but I was blessed to receive a text from Heather about an hour before the event started. She let me know that I was missed already and that the catering director I have worked with since 2004 was looking forward to seeing me the next day at the leadership conference.

I stopped and took that in for a moment. I don’t know why I thought it wouldn’t matter if I weren’t there. I don’t know why I thought no one would care that I was absent. It’s such a small thing. What was I missing anyway? Dinner? Hearing a great guest speaker? Chatting with a friend or a stranger who would become a friend over dinner?  

I knew the event would be a huge success and my presence wasn’t needed, but in that moment after reading Heather’s text I was reminded that my life is connected to others and that we matter to one another.  

I have to tell you that it was extra special the next day to get to see Joe, the catering director, and to visit with support group leaders from around the state. I found myself even more acutely aware of the blessing of knowing each of these precious people, and meeting new friends, too.

The understanding that we are valued, needed, cared for, and cherished as human beings touches us in the deepest places of our hearts, doesn’t it?

Our experience in life is altered, changed, enhanced, and made more meaningful because of the people we connect with in our daily comings and goings. Even the briefest exchange matters. A kind word, a smile, or a helping hand to a stranger you cross paths with for just a moment, they make a world of difference.

Another seemingly insignificant thing happened last week that hit me like an arrow between the eyes.

On Tuesday nights I go to two classes at the gym. In the second class we do lunges every week, which I am not able to do because of an issue with my knee. The first time I took the class, I didn’t know what to do so I just squatted down so I would be out of everyone’s way until the lunges part was over. I felt ridiculous. I talked to the instructor after class and she gave me a modified move I could do instead of the lunges. For more than a year, I have picked a spot on the right side of the room so I could do this modified exercise, steadying myself with a hand on the wall. Every week I do the exercise with confidence and I am thankful to have an option, but I do secretly hope that no one notices me as I do something different than everyone else in the class.

The instructor posted a message on my Facebook page a couple of days ago. She shared with me that another gym member came up to her and said, “Nancy makes me so proud! Lunges are hard for her and still she doesn’t leave. She’s modified the move and pushes through. I love the modification she does. She is great!” The instructor closed by telling me that I inspire people.

Reading that literally made me laugh out loud and it blessed me profoundly at the same time. I laughed because the very thing I was hoping no one would notice had encouraged someone else. And it blessed me because it reminded me how much we matter to others ... even when we think no one notices.

Most days I wonder if I’ll ever lose this 40 pounds, but I keep working at it. I don’t have a testimony to share yet. I still have much hard work to do before I reap the rewards of this weight loss journey. And yet my effort matters now. My attitude matters now. My dedication matters now. And even when I don’t realize someone else sees me, I know that I am making an impact.

It nurtures something deep in my soul to know that my life matters, even in the smallest of moments. But even more than that, it makes me all the more aware of how much of an impact each one of us has, even when we aren’t paying attention to those around us.

The Holy Spirit is stirring my heart, leading me to repentance, renewing a desire to make the most of every interaction, that I would share the love and goodness of God with others in every word and deed.

You matter. A lot. Your words. Your actions. Just being you. It all matters. You enrich the lives of others ever single day. People you may never even meet. You touch them. You bless them. You encourage and inspire them.

And most importantly, you matter to the Creator of the universe. It doesn’t really get much better than that, does it? 

Psalm 19:14 “Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart
be acceptable in Your sight, oh Lord, my strength and my Redeemer.”

Proverbs 25:11 “A word fitly spoken and in due season is like apples of gold in settings of silver.”

Comments

[Heather]

YES! We matter. We were created to be in community and I love to see the blessings that come forth when we do so...

[Nancy Manos]

I love that, Heather! Community - connecting - being joined and knit together is so important!